Where No Man Has Gone Before

53

 

 

“Warp factor fucking ninety, Mr. Carmichael!”

Well, so much for appeals. My Lord Goodell has discovered he was right all along, and Sean Payton, Mickey Loomis, and Joe Vitt shall serve their well-meted punishments. So let it be written, so let it be done.

We really had no reason to expect otherwise. Not only has Goodell never demonstrated either flexibility, proportionality, or humility, but also there was nothing new to lay before him. I think this time the media had it right: Payton was simply playing for time. Time to get his ducks in a row. Time to arrange for his successor to take over the bridge. Time to repair the damage to the engineering compartment, put in a new stock of dilithium crystals, purge the ship of tribbles, and put to space. To kick some ass.

This is right in line with the original mission statement, too: “To boldly go where no man has gone before.” Never before has the NFL kicked a Super Bowl-winning coach to the curb in this fashion. And if the Saints play this thing right, never before has Roger Goodell been dumped in a cesspit this deep. Sean Payton, motivator extraordinaire and winner of a Super Bowl, yields the con to Bill Parcells, motivator extraordinaire and winner of a two Super Bowls. “The club and the individuals will be expected to cooperate in any further proceedings” must be Klingon for “Oops.” Because—again, if the Saints play this thing right—My Lord Goodell has just been forked.

No, forked: as in, two pieces attacked simultaneously. How in the world can Goodell make an example of the Saints if they tear through the NFL like a photon torpedo through Chinese drywall? If he exudes mercy (yes, with Goodell it is a disease) and allows Payton to helm the Super Bowl run, then obviously he didn’t do enough to punish the Saints. But if he bans Payton and the Saints win the damn thing anyway, he still didn’t do enough. Obviously. Plus, he’s racist.

Yeah, I know, that last bit didn’t make sense (like it usually does?). But neither does anything that’s happened since the NFL first accused the Saints of crimes against humanity. Fortunately, the world seems to be waking up and taking notice. Around the fringes, reporters and columnists seem finally to be grokking that it’s all an enormous public relations stunt to convince the public (read: “jury pool”) that the NFL gives a damn about player safety; and besides, it’s the players’ own fault anyway. The latest to take notice are Brian Frederick in the Huffington Post and Dan Le Batard in the Miami Herald. As usual, the bloggers have been leading the way; among the media, it’s the small-fry who first notice that something stinks with the official story; and the Peter Kings and Pete Priscos keep on blundering the wrong way up the offramp. Plus, they’re racist.

UPDATE

“I dunno…maybe send in Shanle?”

Well, so much for Parcells. I mean, surely the media is reporting the truth this time. Either way, it gives me an excuse for another Photoshop session…which takes the sting away from losing out on something that would have been truly epic.

No it doesn’t. Who am I kidding? Merde…

UPDATE

Oh me of little faith. Little faith in the media, that is…yet I keep getting caught over and over again, just like everyone else. Pat Kirwan has an opinion piece at CBS Sports today about the probability of Parcells taking the job. The relevant quote:

Bill Parcells knows exactly how to put out the fire of expectations. He simply says he’s not going to do it, and the story goes on the shelf for the time being. Joe Vitt the interim head coach and suspended for the first six games? I don’t think so.

Kirwan has worked with Parcells; he knows a lot of people who know Parcells; and he seems convinced that Parcells actually wants the job (as he should). According to Kirwan, nine out of ten Parcells friends he spoke with believed he wanted to coach the Saints; one thought his health might not allow it.

So what will happen? Who knows? Not me…but not the media, either. All they can do right now is express opinions which may or may not have any more validity than our own.

Pat Kirwan is also only expressing his opinion. He’s making a guess. But the fact that he knows and has worked with Parcells makes his opinion more trustworthy than most.

Only Parcells and Mickey Loomis really know what’s going on…and Mickey probably has doubts, too.

Posted by Himself in Sheer Awesomeness | 53 comments

53 Comments

Please note: This Comments section is provided as a forum in which visitors may express themselves freely, as in any other public forum in America. However, slanderous, threatening, abusive, or off-topic replies, or spam of any kind, are subject to deletion. (Threats, for that matter, will be promptly reported to the proper authorities.) We also reserve the right to terminate user accounts at any time, at our discretion. Readers should not assume any endorsement by Who Dat Social Club of any opinion or assertion of fact occurring in any comment (other than those generated as replies by the writers of Who Dat Social Club), or linked to by any comment. Having said all this: have at it, and thank your forefathers for their wisdom in guaranteeing free speech, and Al Gore for inventing the Internet.

  • CrazyCrawdadApril 10, 2012 at 1:49 pm

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

     

    Great job! Fresh viewpoint! I, too, am old enough to remember the Sixties. Let’s ROCK this thing!

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
  • alunn2April 10, 2012 at 2:06 pm

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

     

    The Picture and caption ……..lmfao …thanks

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
  • cajuncommando58April 10, 2012 at 3:41 pm

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

     

    whaz up mtne. cc58 stopping by. loved the article and not buying all the whodats invoking the not watching the NF fuckin L any more spegal.  No way I'm gonna miss our Saints and Drew hoisting that Lombardi in Februrary. By the way, missed spelled on  Porpoise, to see if you had spellcheck workin here. Evedently not.
    Because we embrace bounties…

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
    • HimselfApril 10, 2012 at 4:06 pm

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

       

      Porpoise. Fixed. See, there's going to be a lotta bugs for a bit.

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
  • cajuncommando58April 10, 2012 at 3:41 pm

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

     

    OK my image didn't post… You need to work on dat.
     

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
    • HimselfApril 10, 2012 at 4:11 pm

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

       

      Image didn't post? Currently the editor doesn't even have a "post image" button…so I don't know what you're referring to. What exactly did you do?

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
      • AcquiredPanicApril 10, 2012 at 4:27 pm

        Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

         

        Apparently we just do whatever the hell we want to……wonder where we learned that from?

        Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
    • HimselfApril 10, 2012 at 4:57 pm

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

       

      Okay, there were separate enabling commands for the editor and the comments editor. You should now be able to embed photos. Let's see…

      Yup, that worked.

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
      • cc58April 10, 2012 at 6:04 pm

        Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

         

        OK I tried posting an image three times. Showed up in the body until I hit submit, then nothing.
        Also maybe a preview button. I'm assuming, and I hate that word, well because, you know, the image icon is supposed to work the same as at CSC.

        Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
  • AcquiredPanicApril 10, 2012 at 4:19 pm

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

     

    Ok…where the hell is Stu? I figured he would be one of the first to setup an account.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
    • HimselfApril 10, 2012 at 4:52 pm

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

       

      He's been banned.

      No, seriously: he was the very first sign-up, and the very first comment (sorry Dave) other than "Mr. WordPress." But that was on the first, experimental post when I was still setting things up…and that post is on indefinite suspension, and took all its comments with it. I'm still waiting for his unique presence to lend a whiff of pungency to this affair. In a good way.

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
    • stujo4April 10, 2012 at 11:40 pm

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

       

      What is up, slightly effeminate and yet fiercely heterosexual Saints fans as far as I know?  Here's where we get to express ourselves honestly and plainly in a language everyone can understand.  Frenchie has his dictionary handy, so it's cool.
       
       

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
      • AcquiredPanicApril 14, 2012 at 11:35 am

        Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

         

        So strange to see the stujo4 handle being used on a thread. I feel like I’m witnessing “the resurrection”. Not that I’m saying you are christ-like or anything. Although if you can do magic tricks…..

        Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
  • cc58April 10, 2012 at 5:27 pm

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

     

    Ok… here's the image I tried to copy and paste earlier…should have followed, Because we embrace bounties

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
  • cc58April 10, 2012 at 5:29 pm

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

     

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
  • David KellyApril 10, 2012 at 5:58 pm

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

     

    Awesome post! I love the original Star Trek. That's some mighty impressive Photoshopping!

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
    • HimselfApril 10, 2012 at 6:04 pm

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

       

      Thanks, Satch. I guess I have to change it now, though.

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
  • cc58April 10, 2012 at 5:59 pm

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

     
    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
  • cc58April 10, 2012 at 2:13 pm

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

     

    http://ts1.mm.bing.net/images/thumbnail.aspx?q=4901507390573232&id=a700ecdad1a3b3e62b99d3254f8c8e8e

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
    • AcquiredPanicApril 10, 2012 at 2:23 pm

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

       

      Keep trying CC….I think you almost got it ;)

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
      • cc58April 10, 2012 at 2:35 pm

        Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

         

        no. that's the link, but the image won't post.

        Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
      • cc58April 12, 2012 at 3:18 pm

        Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

         

        Now we got it…
        Because we embrace bounties…

        Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
  • cc58April 10, 2012 at 2:42 pm

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

     

    HELP

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
  • cc58April 10, 2012 at 2:43 pm

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

     

    still trying

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
  • cc58April 10, 2012 at 2:46 pm

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

     

    again

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
  • cc58April 10, 2012 at 2:46 pm

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

     

    ok I give

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
  • cc58April 10, 2012 at 3:03 pm

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

     

    ok color me stubborn.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
    • BRSaintsFanApril 10, 2012 at 6:46 pm

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

       

      I'll just call you "not a doctor."-you have no patients! ha!

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
  • Doc BoudinApril 10, 2012 at 8:18 pm

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

     

    Just thought I'd see if I could do it…

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
    • Doc BoudinApril 10, 2012 at 8:18 pm

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

       

      And apparently, not…

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
  • Doc BoudinApril 10, 2012 at 8:21 pm

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

     


    Okay, I can see the image.  So does it come up?

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
    • Doc BoudinApril 10, 2012 at 8:21 pm

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

       

      Oh, hell no. 

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
      • Doc BoudinApril 10, 2012 at 8:35 pm

        Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

         
        Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
        • Doc BoudinApril 10, 2012 at 11:07 pm

          Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

           

          And In Safari…

          Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
  • Doc BoudinApril 10, 2012 at 8:30 pm

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

     

    Your second Photoshop was freakin' awesome.  If Vitt gets the job, we might see that expression a lot more than we want…

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
  • HansDatApril 10, 2012 at 9:39 pm

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

     

    31 comments, most all from Clayton (and Clayton's that anonymous crew member in blue on the away team who gets zapped) and Doc…bumbling around
    just like a real episode of Star Trek!!
    Excellent work, M-E – I love the look and feel of this place…
    One question to Himself…text reads "Payton yields the con to Parcells…" and I always thought it was "com" you know, short for "command"? 
    Thanks for setting this up, I look forward to visiting often!
     

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
    • HimselfApril 10, 2012 at 9:48 pm

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

       

      M-E (whoever he is) thanks you for the kind words, Hans.

      As for your question: to con the ship means to have responsibility for directing its passage, for steering it. "You have the con" is traditionally what one officer of the watch says to another when the watch is changed on the bridge.

      I'm going to have to summon up M-E to get to the bottom of these image difficulties.

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
      • HansDatApril 11, 2012 at 9:07 am

        Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

         

        Well, ok then.  Thanks for settling the con/com debate in my head…been hearing it wrong for YEARS, but no more!!
        Trying a "Next Generation" image now:

        Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
        • HansDatApril 11, 2012 at 9:10 am

          Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

           

          nope – showed up in preview but then not in my reply window after I clicked submit
          my process: I found an image via google images and then pasted the url to the image only in the url window of the image info tab in the image properties pane
          my browser is Firefox

          Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
    • Doc BoudinApril 10, 2012 at 11:02 pm

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

       

      Dammit, Hans, I'm a Doctor, not a computer programmer!  Actually, I'm not really an MD either, but I play one on CSC. 

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
  • MtnExileApril 10, 2012 at 9:52 pm

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

     

    Hello, MtnExile here, and I'm going to try this out just to make sure that embedding photos isn't an admin-only function. For the record, I am only a subscriber and have no admin privileges whatsoever, because apparently Himself doesn't trust me enough.
    So here goes. I'm going to click on the "Image" button (the one right next to the omega at the end of the top row) and paste "http://media.nola.com/tv_impact/photo/drew-brees-trophyjpg-0f151758a4567013_small.jpg" into the text field when the Image Properties window pops up. Here goes…

    And there it is. Now: will it still be there after I hit "Submit"?

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
    • HimselfApril 10, 2012 at 9:56 pm

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

       

      No, it isn't. Worked the first time. But this time I'm using Firefox instead of Safari; so let's see if it's a browser issue.

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
      • Doc BoudinApril 10, 2012 at 11:09 pm

        Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

         

        Are you a wizard?  I can't get an image to come through in either Firefox or Safari.

        Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
      • cc58April 11, 2012 at 10:56 am

        Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

         

        I think it works as himself because he has editor privileges, whereas mtne, is seen as just another member. Don't think the prowser should have anything to do with it. Am I going to have to download wordpress, just to figure it out?

        Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
        • cc58April 11, 2012 at 10:57 am

          Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

           

          prowser = browser… now spell check wants to work.

          Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
  • Just Nother DayApril 11, 2012 at 2:10 am

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

     

    Had a little snaffu trying to register.  Let's see if I'm in now.  (crosses fingers)

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
    • Just Nother DayApril 11, 2012 at 2:11 am

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

       

      TA-DAA!!!

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
  • philistineApril 11, 2012 at 5:58 pm

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

     

    Hey! Bobby Petrino’s available!

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
    • AcquiredPanicApril 14, 2012 at 11:37 am

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

       

      Seeing Petrino in a neck brace brought a smile to my face….not wishing injury on him or anything but I thought the scene was very ironic and fit his career as a whole.

      Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
      • philistineApril 14, 2012 at 12:47 pm

        Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

         

        Evel Petrievel is a classic psychopath, and his little bimbette is little better. It couldn’t have happened to a more deserving couple.

        Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
        • HansDatApril 14, 2012 at 1:02 pm

          Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

           

          bimbette = Eva Petrievel?

          Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
          • philistineApril 14, 2012 at 1:15 pm

            Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

             

            Heh.

            Works for me.

            Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote
        • cc58April 14, 2012 at 5:55 pm

          Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

           

          Have you seen his new Tee…
          Front

          Back

          Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0 Please log in to vote

Leave a comment

Create an Account | Already a member?

Archives

Categories

Blogroll

The Crass Upstarts

“A riot is an ugly thing.”

The Legitimate Media

“Now, gods, stand up for bastards!”

The Establishment

“Love ’em or hate’em, ya gotta love ’em. And hate ’em.”

Support Troops

“In token of our appreciation for services rendered, this fine, fat link.”

Because We Care

“FYYFF.”