Daily Special, May 31, 2012

9

 

 

New Orleans can rest easy. The Pro Bowl will not be “played” in the Superdome, but will instead return to Oahu, an island synonymous with languid beaches and languider pro football players on the languidest weekend of the year. That’s the kind of publicity you can’t buy, not even with Drew Brees-type money.

And New Orleans can rest easy. The Saints will have to pay Brees now, because their fall-back plan fell back all the way to prone. Kordell Stewart, the original Slash, has officially retired. I know, you feel like going after your wrists with a butter knife, a screwdriver, some pieces of a shattered go-cup, whatever comes to hand, because Stewart was going to save the Saints in their hour of direst peril. Alas, it won’t happen now. We’re still going to have to depend on Chase, until he goes to Dallas.

And that leaves us right back where we were yesterday: what’s up with Drew and Mickey? AngryWhoDat has another guest article at Canal Street Chronicles, doing the heavy lifting by reading the NFL’s collective bargaining agreement so you don’t have to (to me, the CBA is honorary math). His conclusions might not be right; but—and this is the whole point—right now, nobody knows what right is. Not even the NFLPA, which has asked an arbitrator to clarify the issue. The arbitrator’s reply was reportedly, “Let me get back to you on that…I need to talk to Roger first.”

Mike Triplett says it shouldn’t matter. Then he realizes it actually does. “What’s really at stake here is a battle for leverage in these lingering long-term contract negotiations.” Exactly. And, to give him his due, he knew that all along. So did you. Mike just needed to come up with another 3,000 words before deadline, because his paper needs all the inbound links it can get right now. Okay, Mike, here you are.

Let’s see…Andrew Juge wonders if Sedrick Ellis has lived up to expectations. Actually, I do too—because I don’t know what the team itself expected. Warren Sapp? You’d sure think so, based on his draft position. What did Sedrick expect? Millions of dollars and a Super Bowl ring?

On Pat Y’s NFC South update, he links to an article on ThePigskinReport that contends the Saints can only win 4, maybe 5 games with Chase Daniel. That schedule is just too brutal. Yeah, well, that schedule includes eight games in, like, the Superdome, so there’s a good chance of an 8-8 record right there. Pat Y says something “around .500″ is more likely, and I agree: I’ve already said 9-7, and I’m sticking to it (and hoping to Christ I never have to find out who’s right).

And finally, just browsing through sidebars, I see that Paul Kuharsky of ESPN thinks Blaine Gabbert can rebound this year. Yeah, and Pluto can regain its planetary status, but only if it agrees to perform “Fox on the Run” in leopard-skin hot pants. And, while that’s theoretically possible, I don’t see it happening.

On the Jukebox

No, it’s not “Fox on the Run.” It’s not even Sweet. It’s actually kinda bitter. (So why is Louie giggling?)

Posted by Himself in Daily Specials | 9 comments

9 Comments

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  • PhilistineMay 31, 2012 at 11:19 am

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    That’s a sweet tune. Can you break this bill for some quarters? I want to check out the jukebox.

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  • FriarBobMay 31, 2012 at 1:46 pm

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    Drew better pray we only win 4 games with Chase. If we go 9-7 or better, every single bit of goodwill Drew has earned over the last four years will vanish like a soap bubble. The fans will be like “who we drafting with our extra 1st and 3rd” and “see ya, you greedy chump”.

    Hell, I’m almost already there anyway, and we might well still go 0-16.

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    • cc58May 31, 2012 at 2:08 pm

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      Now Bob calm down. Don’t give up on Saint Drew just yet.

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      • PhilistineMay 31, 2012 at 2:40 pm

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        All I have to say to this is – “Dayumm!”

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      • HimselfMay 31, 2012 at 2:49 pm

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        Please tell me that’s Photoshopped. Please tell me no one would do something like that to herself.

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        • cc58June 1, 2012 at 12:51 pm

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          No and I can show you more…

          Now I don’t know if the are permanent tats, or the applique kind except for that full torso, that is probably real.

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  • SaintsW1nMay 31, 2012 at 2:19 pm

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    Instead of spouting my own babble, let me just succinctly quote GM Wang and move along:

    “[Brees} is the single best thing that’s ever happened to your favorite football team. How much more does he ‘owe’ you? How much more does he have to do for you before he’s allowed to look out for his own interests without immediately being branded an asshole?

    This just in: Drew Brees doesn’t owe you jack shit.”

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  • cc58May 31, 2012 at 2:20 pm

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    OK I had to share this hope it lightens every bodies day.
    People Of Walmart (Sexy And I Know It – LMFAO)

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    • HimselfMay 31, 2012 at 2:51 pm

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      You may be legally liable for all eye damage.

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