Daily Special, June 28, 2012
4 Posted on June 28th, 2012 by Himself
My cat is gone. This is the second morning he hasn’t shown up. He’s a Maine Coon, a defensive lineman of a cat. He doesn’t walk, he lumbers; and when he jumps off the bed he lands with the sound of work boots. He’s definitely no lap cat; instead, he flops at your feet like a dog. You can make him yawn by rubbing his nose. He is, in short, a character.
But where the hell is he? Waking up to this is like arriving at the stadium to find the goal posts on the sidelines: whatever game plan you might have prepared is out the window. It’s difficult to get too excited about things like contract negotiations. Football games are just phosphors. Where is my damn cat, damn it?
Those negotiations? They’re not going to be resolved anytime soon. The ruling in Brees’ grievance won’t come until sometime next week.
Bountygate? Not over yet, either. The latest development is from Jonathan Vilma, who has informed the U.S. District Court judge hearing his case that if Goodell doesn’t rescind his suspension on appeal, Vilma intends to file for an injunction. I guess we can confidently state that Vilma will file for an injunction.
There isn’t much else in football news (as if the foregoing isn’t important enough). Drew was voted the #2 player in the entire league last year, coming in behind Aaron Rodgers. What the hell has the guy got to do? Maybe if set records for completion percentage and yardage, AND led the league in tackles. Or, maybe, if he became the league’s highest-paid player. Ryan Jones of the T-P said that the players did no favor to the Saints by rating Brees this high; where they really screwed the Saints was leaving Drew only one realistic chance of coming in at the top of the list…and it’s the Saints who are going to have to pay through the nose to make that happen.
Colston’s health is increasingly becoming an issue, and the team doesn’t have a receiver with a complete No. 1 skillset otherwise with Meachem gone. Lance Moore is an excellent hands guy, and Devery Henderson has his moments, but that’s about it. Adrian Arrington has yet to prove he is capable of handling a bigger role, and while rookie Nick Toon is promising, he probably won’t get much work this year. The team might have kept the wrong wideout for the future.
I can understand deadline pressure, but yeeesh. Mantzouranis is cheating here: it’s a safe bet that the Saints’ passing game will tail off from last year’s miraculous total, but it won’t be due to Meachem’s absence. When it happens, though, it will give Mantzouranis a cheap opportunity to jump up and down and shriek “Ooh! Called it! Called it!”
Speaking of cheating: Fox Sports (actually the New York Post, but they’re both owned by the detestable Rupert Murdoch) reports that Tim Tebow has come in second in a poll by the detestable AshleyMadison.com. The question? “What sports figure would you most like to cheat on your husband with?” In a demonstration of their desperation, some housewives actually chose Tiger Woods.
What is the point of this? To further condition people to believe that broken homes and damaged psyches are no big deal? That a bit of tawdry thrill is more important than loyalty, honesty, honor? That the existence of such a site, and such people, is funny? Or maybe they see society’s downhill slide as some sort of sporting event: civilizational luge.
Where IS my cat?
On the Jukebox
Four years before I was born, this song was released into a country that still had a functioning moral compass—and, apparently, a healthy appreciation for irony.