Man, this blogging thing…in the offseason, it gets to the point where you feel as though you’re hanging from a cliff by your fingernails. You’ll clutch at a straw, at a bug, anything to avoid that screaming plunge into terminal boredom.
I was all set to write on the silliness surrounding Minnesota governor Mark Dayton’s apology for remarks he made comparing football to war—remarks so dead-on they could be described as cliches. Then I started digging into it and couldn’t find out who had actually objected, and there was no “there” there. It seems Dayton made a purely voluntary apology; and frankly, it seems he made it in order to rack up Sensitive Liberal points—more caring than you. He should be strapped down in a chair and forced to watch the entire 1985 Bears season, until he embraces the violence inherent in the system.
I even made a camo helmet graphic.
Let’s see…Jonathan Vilma lost a bid to get a quick ruling on his bid to get an injunction in his bid to continue rehabbing at the Saints’ facility. Or something. Sometimes I just wish we still had Solomon around to dispense justice.
24 And the king said, Bring me a sword. And they brought a sword before the king.
25 And the king said, Divide the living commissioner in two, and give half to the one, and half to the other.
26 Then spake the public whose the living team was unto the king, for their bowels yearned upon their team, and they said, O hell yes!
Here’s something: Visanthe Shiancoe is meeting with the Patriots, who need another tight end like I need more writer’s block. This might be good news in disguise, though: the Saints need another good tight end; and when the Patriots sign Shiancoe and cut Gronkowski to teach him a lesson, the Saints can snap him up and have the greatest tight end tandem in history. No? Well, prove it.
Maybe if I just pick something at random…
Oh yeah: Randall Gay is suing the league. Seems he hit his head playing football, and it was all the league’s fault. Here’s how the Associated Press put it: “a newly filed lawsuit accusing the NFL of failing to protect players from concussion risks.” Like…how? The Saints can prove they protected Gay from concussion risks: they cut him. Can’t do much more than that.
On the Jukebox
This is probably the perfect day to get this one over with.
BewareofDogJuly 20, 2012 at 10:36 am
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How about, on slow days, if you do a Point/Counterpoint session with a patron of the bar on a specific topic? It could be a series with a different WDSC member and topic each week.
It could go something like this….
This Week’s Topic: Drew Brees – Now that he has a $100 million contract, when is he gonna get that shit taken off his face? AND WHAT THE HELL IS THAT THING ANYWAY!!!
I’ll get things started.
“Himself, you ignorant slut……”
David KellyJuly 20, 2012 at 10:50 am
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Very helpful juke today! That video will help me fill in the blanks on all of the riffs I’ve either forgotten since my rock/metal days or never played. I’m always looking for new riffs that my young rock students might be interested in learning and will also be helpful for their development of the proper techniques. I already teach them about 40 of the riffs that guy played. This will help me catalog many more I hadn’t thought of before. I can’t believe I wasn’t teaching them songs like “Day Tripper,” “Crossroads,” and “Pipeline” before. Most of my students are too young to know those songs and who those bands were, but once I play them the riff they remember hearing it on the radio and then are excited about learning it.
HimselfJuly 20, 2012 at 10:57 am
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Can you actually play all that stuff? Man, I hate you.
David KellyJuly 20, 2012 at 11:30 am
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When you spend lots of time playing thrash metal riffs and fast Rhoads, Van Halen, and Hammett guitar solos like I did back in the 90′s, those riffs in the video become very easy. I was practicing 3-6 hours every day back then. I wish I still had the time and energy to do that now.
HimselfJuly 20, 2012 at 11:38 am
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Can you remember how it felt when you were first starting out on the guitar? How your mind, your understanding, moved quicker than your fingers? And you’d sit there trying to play something, knowing what your fingers were supposed to do, and watching helplessly as they did…absolutely unaccountable things.
“No! NO! Damn it, the third fret! That’s right. Wait…NO! The third fret, damn it!”
Well, my stupid fingers are still at that stage. No matter how much I practice (which, frankly, I don’t anymore). They’re as spastic as Joe Cocker. Maybe I should just sing.
David KellyJuly 20, 2012 at 12:21 pm
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Do you play riffs/songs very slowly when you first learn them? I’m always telling students to slow it down to a crawl when first learning riffs and then speed it up only when you can play it comfortably at the slower tempo. Just recently I was teaching a young student the “Crazy Train” main riff and had to keep telling him to simply slow it down and this will help him more quickly remember where his fingers go. I learned this when I was studying classical guitar and all of the complicated contrapuntal music by Bach and others I was playing then. Slow practice helps our brains, ears, and fingers connect faster and leads to a quicker development of finger muscle memory. This allows us to play the music by simply thinking about it and without focusing on what our hands and fingers are doing for each note.
Now pick up that guitar and try again, Mister!
HimselfJuly 20, 2012 at 12:36 pm
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What I’ve found–and I can’t pretend that I “know” this, because obviously I haven’t been able to put it into practice–is that in order to be a good instrumentalist, your instrument has to become as instinctive as your body. You can tell just about anyone to hum a tune, and they know how. You have to be able to pick up a guitar and without thinking about it play any given note instantly, just as you’d be able to hum that note instantly (assuming, of course, you can carry a tune without a bucket).
I can’t do that. To me, music is still code. I have to count frets, starting from a known point, to get to the second A flat above middle C, for instance. And even when my mind knows what to do, my goddamned fingers keep playing the wrong fret!
David KellyJuly 20, 2012 at 12:53 pm
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We all were that way when first starting. I didn’t know A minor from Asia Minor back then. I had to count frets and concentrate on making sure my fret fingers were on the same string as my pick/pluck hand. It’s definitely hardest at the beginning stages. Only consistent practice (preferably every day or at least every other day) will get us over that hump and into the realm of easy jammin’.
I always start beginners off with simply melodies like “Ode to Joy” and other easy tunes they might have heard so they can have the satisfaction of actually playing music when they are at the stage where their fingers simply aren’t going to cooperate that well. I also get them started with the basic open position chords. With time and practice, we then move onto more challenging tunes and rock riffs, if that’s the music they’re interested in playing.
I always preach the wisdom of the three P’s – practice, patience, and pacing. I sometimes throw in a fourth P – perseverance, for when we get frustrated and nothing seems to go well.
metrymanJuly 21, 2012 at 1:10 am
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More of a Roadie than a Musician, but I’ve pick up chords and riffs, over the yrs. and a few guitars, Uke’s too, just cause every home should have a guitar in it. Got my 11 yr. son interested but he likes the Rich, Deep Sound of the Bass. just picked up a little Epi Les Paul Jr., inexpensive, well built, gonna make it my slide guitar.
FriarBobJuly 20, 2012 at 12:06 pm
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I can’t even play a “real” guitar much less an electric one, but I have to admit that was still cool. Considering I grew up with rock completely verboten, I was almost a bit surprised how I recognized like 85+% of those. Of course, a lot of them got used in movies or TV shows even if I never heard the original song.
cc58July 20, 2012 at 4:32 pm
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The only two songs I ever learned to play with any competence…Smoke on the water…
cc58July 20, 2012 at 4:33 pm
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Damn it. and a horse with no name. That one only has two keys.
cc58July 20, 2012 at 4:37 pm
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Damn it again…Keys=cords.
Doc BoudinJuly 20, 2012 at 5:46 pm
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All you need is four chords. You’re halfway to being a star!
Just Nother DayJuly 20, 2012 at 9:22 pm
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You’re right about “four chords.” I recently bought a used Yamaha Electone from a recycle place for FIVE DOLLARS!!! Got it home, opened in up, jiggled a few wires, and got it working again.
The beginners keyboard course I bought has me practicing such smash hits as:
Jincle Bells, On Top of Old Smokey, and Skip to My Lou.
Of course, you guys will get discounts on tickets to my Carnegie Hall debut!
HimselfJuly 20, 2012 at 5:49 pm
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So, wondering where I’ve been lately? Knew you were. And glad you asked. The Thirsty Monk in Asheville for Friday afternoon beer club. On tap were Pauwel Kwak, Delirium Tremens, Brouwerij Het Anker Lucifer, and De Molen Bommen & Granaten barleywine for dessert. Mmmm. Y’all been hangin’ loose? Good.
GSO Saints FanJuly 20, 2012 at 8:52 pm
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Diggin’ the discussion tonight, and good call on the riff vid, Himself!
Need to get with you on the brews, I’ve had the Delerium Tremens, but the rest….ejumuhkate me! :) I’m slumming this evening, Natty Greene’s Old Town Brown…
Playing music…ah, yes. I remember the frustration thing, guess what: it’s still an issue most of the time – my brain always wants to write checks my hands can’t cash when I have an idea. I can usually get a tune under the digits, but man, improvising can tie my poor psyche in knots a Gordian couldn’t undo.
Mr. Kelly’s on the money with how to get that stuff under the fingers, don’t try to play it at tempo at first – heck, don’t even try to nail the rhythms at first, get the notes under the fingers, then the rhythms, THEN the tempo.
David, got to spend a bit of time with Jimmy Haslip recently….man….what a total monster of a musician. Just huge ears, and a heart the size of Alaska. I got REAL stoked by just soaking up his attitude (no way I’ll ever soak up his talent!), he plays each and every note with such authority and conviction! I found him to be so cool of a cat that I even forgive him his Giants fandom. I did, however, point out that our Saints OWN his Gints – he took it well…but one day I’m certain I will pay for it!
HimselfJuly 20, 2012 at 10:03 pm
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The Lucifer is basically a copy of Duvel. Like all the Bavarian breweries copied Paulaner’s Salvator and gave their versions names ending in -ator, a lot of Belgian breweries have copied Duvel and given their versions “diabolical” names. I still like Duvel better.
Kwak is another pale ale (not a Duvel clone), but apparently a lot of people seem to find it lacking in taste. I think maybe it’s lacking in distinction, considering the extremely high bar set by every other Belgian. If you compare it to almost any American brew, it wins a taste test hands down (to me). It’s solid.
The Bommen & Granaten…well, here’s how the menu described it:
That’s almost a perfect description. All that plus 15.2 ABV.
GSO Saints FanJuly 21, 2012 at 12:38 am
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….you had me at barleywine….Bommen & Granaten is on the “list” now.
I’ll probably miss the Kwak, not a pale ale fan, and beating an American beer is damning with faint praise.
The Duvel is drinkable, so I may give the Lucifer a spin.
I really need to make it up there soon…maybe come up for the weekend with the missus once the season starts, do the whole tourist thing on Saturday, then catch a game on Sunday, with a trip to the Monk in there somewhere.
metrymanJuly 21, 2012 at 1:01 am
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Shiner Bohemian Black …..Get u some
GSO Saints FanJuly 21, 2012 at 8:22 am
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Oh I have, and it’s quite good as well! Shiner is a very good brewery, far superior to the megacrap outfits like Miller or Bud.
Just Nother DayJuly 20, 2012 at 9:09 pm
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The juke today was awsome. I’m glad he included Funk 49 and Thunderstruck, two of my favorites.
Makes me want to buy my old drum set back, if I could find somebody to haul it around for me.
Should have learned to play fucking harmonica!